2011 Chicago Con report (Sunday part four - the David & Joe Show, pt 3, duo photos, the rest)

[elderwitty]

David's thinking, "Hold it in 'til he looks away."


His faaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!

. . . . . .


I think this was a flashback to Romanian film crews

This happened way early, but I forgot to put it in. Joe, after being asked if he did any imitations, did one of himself - and yes, he used the high pitched voice. Then he grunted for Jason, and asked David about Rachel. David said there was a lot of this, "Oh, you guys." (as Rachel)




I'm not sure who was laughing harder, him or me.


We're okay now.


Face palming at the professional level. (Does anybody remember why?)




He's all fuzzy blonde smiling edges.

Joe talked about having to actually learn some martial arts for his movie, rather than counting on Jason-as-Ronon to soften them up so he could shoot them a la Dr. Jones.


Action Flanigan!


David translates for sgafan after the mike went out











When the Creation people signaled them, Joe said they had time for one more question, and David said, “So it better be a good one.” And then, in a slightly higher pitch, as if speaking as a female, he asked, “How are you so awesome?” I nearly shattered Walter’s arm with my elbow. “Did you hear that?!” “No, what?” I reported what David had said, and we both completely missed the question in the resulting squee. (If you don’t get it, go read the last line of the poem in “Sunday part one”.) Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

They wrapped it up (much to our dismay) and we headed off for our duo photo op.


Before I get to the photo op, let's talk about Joe's pants. More specifically, his pants just below the knee. They look like they have cans of Skoal in them. I thought it was a trick of the light or wrinkles. After reviewing the photo crop, I can say without hesitation that there's something in the legs of Joe's pants! Does anyone have a clue? Knee armor? Knee corsets? Kneepads on the down low? ;>
(Click to enlarge - it really shows the ... whatever they are, especially in the last two photos.)















Maybe next year someone should ask him what's in his pants. :unholy glee:


Duo photo op

Creation showed their lack of logic here. There were three lines: Joe only, duo, David only. The “Joe only” line started at the photo op room door, on the left wall. Sensible. The “Duo” line started on the right wall. The “David only” line started behind a column in the middle of the walkway. Uh, what? It blocked access to the bathrooms. Even worse - after the “Joe only” line died down, they moved the "Duo" line from the right wall to the left … around, through (above and below, for all I know) the “David only” line. Really? And they planned this, because they’d made line signs. They crossed the streams, people! I really need to go work for these people – obviously, it should be “first line on the left, second line in the middle (moving to the left when the first is almost done), third line on the right (staying there until the second group nears the photo room). Is that really so very hard to figure out? (I know not everyone has The Logic ^TM, but you'd think someone would.)

I have a plan to increase the length of time available for autographing, too. :smile: (I’m sure it will be soundly rejected, due to its logical basis.) See the end of this entry.

Hot, military, banner-buying guy was right behind us, carrying that day’s haul. I overcame my innate timidity (stop LAUGHING!) to ask how many he’d bought. Five or six. I relayed our theory that he was doing up his basement. He lives in Florida, so no basement, but he and the missus are going to redecorate his media room. Ah, says I, six of one.... :D I asked why his wife hadn’t come and he said 'money', and he wasn’t sure how she was going to react to all his purchases. I suggested he sell the old decorations online to recoup some of his costs. (I’m sure it’ll be fine - it sounds like the media room has comfy chairs.)

It’s his first con, and I congratulated him on diving right in, what with the detailed costume and all. He just smiled and said, “I’m a Commander.” All he’d added was the orange walkie-talkie and the fake gun, and they wouldn’t let him keep that in his holster because it still looked too real. It was allowed for the photo, though. This led to a discussion of the orange tip on toy guns. I asked what’s to stop criminals from dipping their gun’s tip in paint, and use that to cause hesitation in police/military forces. He said nothing, and that’s what a lot of them are concerned about. (boo, criminals)

He went off to fight his way to the restroom, which is when they moved our line. Of course. :D We grabbed all his loot and carried over, trusting him to recognize it, if not us. :D He did, and we started talking about what to do to avoid Joe’s cut-n-paste face. He didn’t know what that was, so we explained. I suggested that when it was his turn he should goose Joe. :smirk: I knew he wouldn’t, but his face was a treat!


Got to watch Walter get his photo taken, then asked the guys if they could pretend to be having a ‘heated discussion’ over my head while I smiled, happy-fan oblivious. First shot = glare over my eyeball, resulting in a look of evil cyborg.



Do over. The photog looked at the photo for a really long time – so long that Joe and David were ejecting me from the area, and the military guy was coming in. I said, “Guys, he doesn’t look too sure,” but stepped aside. The three of them were all set up by the time the photog said, “We’ll have to do it again.”


What was there to decide? :laughs:

The commander stepped out, and I stepped back in. A suggestion to remove my glasses was made, and I said, “But then I can’t see.” They all looked at me mockingly (including the fans in line). Um, excuse me? You want me to make sense while I’m in the presence – nay, the hug sandwich - of David and Joe? (Shut up, I’ll take ‘em off next year.) Shot was taken, and I asked Joe what he’d been doing over there (in my peripheral vision). He said he was making the crazy finger. Understandable. Off I went to rejoin Walter.



I’m not even bothered that I look crazy-eyed, goofy, and apprehensive (?)(!) respectively, because I managed to get three, count 'em three non-cut-n-paste faces from Joe. In a row! All different! (That’s like getting seven cherries on a slot machine, right?) And since they didn’t actually do my idea, I can use it again next time (when I will be wearing decidedly fewer lenses). :grin:

Met up with Walter and went to get his bags from the concierge.

Originally, he’d thought he wasn’t going to be able to do the duo photo op, but his flight was late enough that the ladies at our dessert table convinced him that it was possible, and that he’d regret it if he didn’t. Thank you, ladies!! He’s said several times how glad he is that he got to do it. Anyway, bags collected, hugs exchanged, he headed for the shuttle to the airport, and I went up to get ice from the second floor machine. No such item. Third floor machine – “Shit!” I realized that I had all of his photos. “Stick ‘em in my bag for stashing. Don’t worry, I'll remember to give them back after the photo op.” Yeah, not so much. Go to call him – hey look, a voicemail. Walter: “Come to the lobby. You have my photos.” :chuckle: Oops.

Reconnect. Hand over the hostages. Re-hug. Re-shuttle (this time successfully).

Went back to the ballroom, to wait for the evening autograph session for Joe and Davids H. and D. to start. They were showing videos from previous cons and I got to see almost two minutes before it ended. (Is my luck - I'm used to it.) There was an announcement that the autographs wouldn’t be in here, but outside and to the left. “That’s the whole rest of the lobby,” I thought. “Can’t they be more specific? Whatever, I’ll see the crowd.” Then they started taking down the stage. Oh, they’re serious. Okay. Back out to the lobby, where I told some people about the change, and we decided that Creation must mean the registration table just outside and to the left of the ballroom entry doors. Nope. It was outside and to the other left. You may know it as … the right. :snorgle:

It seems a Jewish wedding was scheduled to start in the ballroom before the con events were scheduled to end. I sat in one of the lobby chairs and watched a parade of fantastic black or brown dresses and black hats parade past. At one point, a wedding group approached from the left, while a Mom/Dad/teenager-in-skank-training-clothing (shortshort lowrider cutoffs, dingy, midriff-baring football jersey, etc.) family unit neared on my right. I expected a cultural explosion, but it did not come to pass. (Wow, who lets their kid dress like that at a hundred-plus dollar a night hotel?) (Wait – I mean, who lets their nanny let their kid dress …. Sorry. Assumptive and judgmental, I know.)

Ran into grammarwoman and we went off to get David H. autographs. Just as we got to the table, a fan walked up and asked a question, so we politely waited, which turned into joining the chatting. Finally, the con handler remembered to ask if we had autograph tickets, which we produced. Kim went first, then I laid my two down, explaining that he got to pick. He liked Trio, but went with Son of Basket to continue the theme. I told him that’s the one everyone predicted he’d choose. He said he’d have to use an artistic signature for this one, and that he liked the reflections. I said, “Thanks! You know, every time I go I say ‘Okay, don’t take any more pictures of the basket’ but when I get home there're always some on the camera.” Thanked him, and went over to the lobby's piano to futz with all my photos.


Trio


Son of Basket
Very artistic signature, don’t you think?


Kassandra (Someone whose name my brain won't tell me) came to get an autograph while I was arranging my binder, and we walked out together, meeting up with Kim. There was apparently a plan to all go to Giordano’s as soon as Kath, Sue, Sue’s sister (whose name I never caught), and sgafan (Cheryl) got out of wherever they were VIPing. Kim and Kassandra (Someone) went off to make plans for that, and the squee party later, and I agreed to send the rest of the gang up to her room when they appeared.

crysothemis wandered by and sat down, and we talked about the con and her kids (and how she had to leave soon to be there for bedtime), and the culture clash in the lobby - and didn’t that one guy’s hat look somehow more like a cowboy’s than the rest, despite having no definable differences from them? (It did, and I still can’t figure out how, since it was identical in construction. Maybe he dusted it with essence of cowboy?) I suddenly realized that I hadn’t been keeping good watch. Oops! crysothemis said she hadn’t seen them, but hadn’t really been looking. I went down and peered through the door at the backstage area and saw Sue, so I supposed it was a pretty safe bet that I hadn’t missed them. Whew!

Went back to my post and chatting. Jess came up to report that the Joe photos were being set out, so it shouldn’t be long ‘til the duos. Without a second thought, I rushed off with them to check. Good thing I never joined the military. Firing squad, for sure. We passed Kassandra, who was waiting for the photog to fix the stoner eyes he let pass through. (I get the feeling he’s not that invested.) More chatting, during which I realized (aloud) that Walter had the slip of paper with Kimberly’s (fan with Paul McG) email. Argh! Luckily, someone heard me, recognized her, and sent her over to give it again. Yeah for community!

The photos came out while she and I were talking about High, Low, and Central Belt Scottish. crysothemis brought mine over. There was more than one, so I thought the rest were hers. Nope – it was the series above. I think the photog couldn’t pick the “best” one, so he sent them all. More for me! Jess, duckyone (Christine), and some others started talking again about food and squee, so we said goodbye to crysothemis as she pointed herself toward home, and headed to Jess’ room to drop anything we didn’t feel like carting to the restaurant (so, everything).

Met Kim in the lobby, and was waiting for the rest (Kassandra and one other having gone ahead to secure us a big table) when duckyone came up the escalator. “Look what I found!” Walter’s photo op, which I’d completely forgotten about in the face of my three photos.



Finally, our group headed for Giordano’s. We got there to find Kassandra and cohort in a tiny corner booth. ??? (It turns out that we took longer to arrive than expected – shocking, right? - so the waitresses kicked them out of the big table and into the corner, insisting that they order right then. Mean.)

We figured our final tally, they wrangled four tables in a line, and we all sat down. They don’t usually split checks, but would treat us as four different tables. (Which was fantastic, since nobody wanted to put dinner for 15 on their card.) Orders in, chatting abounds, and Sue took photos of us all, which led to Christine handing her camera around for the same effect. I’d like to see those. Con photos of all years were handed around and admired. We exchanged email addresses, which was when it finally hit me that Alicia is pavaneofstars. I think I’m slow on Sundays.

Food came, food consumed, we vamoosed. (Kassandra had already gone, to try again with the photog folks. They suck, so no luck. to see if the hot tub could soak away her bad experience with the photo gang. ) Back to the hotel to pick up photo ops and swap con pictures. This year I’m ready – no piddling 4G jump drive. I brought both my external drives: a 250G and an 85G that used to be my laptop’s internal. So much for planning: my big drive is formatted for Mac, and the small one was nearly full. Of photos. That are saved in at least two other places. Der! Kim tried to see what was on it, so I could tell her what to delete, but her machine bogged down and gave up. By the time I got it mostly cleared off with Christine’s notebook, Kim had to leave to start her 3.5 hour drive home. And me my five hour one … whatever, I don’t need sleep. :D

We finally got to see Kim’s video (“Never want to go to work”?) that technical difficulties and bad rescheduling had made most of us miss. And we watched Cheryl’s (“You’ve got a friend in me”) again. Both caused much laughter and awwwwws.

Left about 11:40pm and headed over to the Marriott to retrieve my car and cooler. They reminded me of the toll roads. Argh! I paid the $3.50 ATM usury fee (and it hurt), just to be sure to have enough change. My room card wouldn’t make the gate lift, despite the desk clerk’s earlier assurances. Back to the lobby, got the hint (hit red button), and I was on my way. Midnight.

Just as I was approaching the first toll booth, my phone rang. Walter has landed and is awaiting his connection to home. Yay! But then - oh, noes! I reached to open the little coin compartment in the dash, and managed to pop the hood instead. Freak out, hang up, pull over, secure hood, resume. Luckily the rest of the drive was completely incident free. Got home at 5am and posted my pithy announcement. :P

Fed the cats, started the laundry, hit the hay. And that’s it for another year.

Apologies to anyone I’ve left out (like, for example, gyri ) I know we met four or five times, but I can’t pin them down in the timeline. It was great to see everyone again, and next year I think I’ll take a voice recorder, and make quick notes as I go along.

(Also, next year, I’m going to take Polaroid mug shots of people with their real and LJ names and use 'em as flashcards. And sell folding fans for fun and profit. Psst! Hey, buddy. Wanna buy a fan? :grin: )



The Personalization for All Plan

1) The only announcements made during the autograph sessions were calling up the next row. Nothing else was going on to keep us from getting impatient and restless.

2) Saturday and Sunday they held an auction each day. They weren't massively well attended, and lasted about an hour each day.

Why not combine the events? Run the auction while we’re lined up for autographs? Bidders can wave from the wall as easily as from a seat. When it’s time for the next row to go to the wall, the auctioneer says so between items. It’s a win for them, too, because a larger crowd makes bidding wars more likely, thus raising their take. Announce at the start that whoever wins an item can get out of line to claim it and stash it at their chair before getting back in line where they were. Then nobody would consider them to be butting.

This would add an hour to the autograph session each day, give us some entertainment while we wait (or we can ignore it and chat – just like we did from the seats), and increase Creation’s profits. Can anyone see a downside?

Here's how to sell it to Creation. Tell them it's to increase auction revenue by having a captive, autograph awaiting, audience. Further, suggest that if any fan complains about being forced to attend, they point out that it has been added onto the autograph time, thus increasing it and allowing for personalizations. Spin the Creation-ers by giving them spin for the customers. (My only worry is that they would fold the auction into the autograph time and put something else in its current time slot, leaving us with both an unavoidable sale and no personalizations.)

I told my sister the plan, and when I got to the part about holding the auction while we were in line, she blurted, "Hostages!" (The logic is hereditary, you see.)

ETA: It seems that I hallucinated Kassandra at David's evening autograph. Who was that, and where the hell did I leave my head?

Comments

[foxe (from livejournal.com)]

Okay, I thought I was crazy, but you noticed the weird disc thing in the pants too! I really can't figure out what those could be. Kneepads wouldn't look like that, unless maybe they slipped? I dunno.

Great pics and write up!

joe's pants

[elderwitty]

Thank goodness! I thought it was just me, despite the photographic evidence. I wann know, but I don't want to ask him, ya know? (I hate when people point stuff like that out to me. Makes me feel self-conscious.)

What the hell could they be??

Thanks! (Next year, voice recorder for name/event accuracy. :grin: )