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David's thinking, "Hold it in 'til he looks away."
His faaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!
I think this was a flashback to Romanian film crews
This happened way early, but I forgot to put it in. Joe, after being asked if he did any imitations, did one of himself - and yes, he used the high pitched voice. Then he grunted for Jason, and asked David about Rachel. David said there was a lot of this, "Oh, you guys." (as Rachel)
I'm not sure who was laughing harder, him or me.
We're okay now.
Face palming at the professional level. (Does anybody remember why?)
He's all fuzzy blonde smiling edges.
Joe talked about having to actually learn some martial arts for his movie, rather than counting on Jason-as-Ronon to soften them up so he could shoot them a la Dr. Jones.
Action Flanigan!
David translates for
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When the Creation people signaled them, Joe said they had time for one more question, and David said, “So it better be a good one.” And then, in a slightly higher pitch, as if speaking as a female, he asked, “How are you so awesome?” I nearly shattered Walter’s arm with my elbow. “Did you hear that?!” “No, what?” I reported what David had said, and we both completely missed the question in the resulting squee. (If you don’t get it, go read the last line of the poem in “Sunday part one”.) Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
They wrapped it up (much to our dismay) and we headed off for our duo photo op.
Before I get to the photo op, let's talk about Joe's pants. More specifically, his pants just below the knee. They look like they have cans of Skoal in them. I thought it was a trick of the light or wrinkles. After reviewing the photo crop, I can say without hesitation that there's something in the legs of Joe's pants! Does anyone have a clue? Knee armor? Knee corsets? Kneepads on the down low? ;>
(Click to enlarge - it really shows the ... whatever they are, especially in the last two photos.)
Maybe next year someone should ask him what's in his pants. :unholy glee:
Duo photo op
Creation showed their lack of logic here. There were three lines: Joe only, duo, David only. The “Joe only” line started at the photo op room door, on the left wall. Sensible. The “Duo” line started on the right wall. The “David only” line started behind a column in the middle of the walkway. Uh, what? It blocked access to the bathrooms. Even worse - after the “Joe only” line died down, they moved the "Duo" line from the right wall to the left … around, through (above and below, for all I know) the “David only” line. Really? And they planned this, because they’d made line signs. They crossed the streams, people! I really need to go work for these people – obviously, it should be “first line on the left, second line in the middle (moving to the left when the first is almost done), third line on the right (staying there until the second group nears the photo room). Is that really so very hard to figure out? (I know not everyone has The Logic TM, but you'd think someone would.)
I have a plan to increase the length of time available for autographing, too. :smile: (I’m sure it will be soundly rejected, due to its logical basis.) See the end of this entry.
Hot, military, banner-buying guy was right behind us, carrying that day’s haul. I overcame my innate timidity (stop LAUGHING!) to ask how many he’d bought. Five or six. I relayed our theory that he was doing up his basement. He lives in Florida, so no basement, but he and the missus are going to redecorate his media room. Ah, says I, six of one.... :D I asked why his wife hadn’t come and he said 'money', and he wasn’t sure how she was going to react to all his purchases. I suggested he sell the old decorations online to recoup some of his costs. (I’m sure it’ll be fine - it sounds like the media room has comfy chairs.)
It’s his first con, and I congratulated him on diving right in, what with the detailed costume and all. He just smiled and said, “I’m a Commander.” All he’d added was the orange walkie-talkie and the fake gun, and they wouldn’t let him keep that in his holster because it still looked too real. It was allowed for the photo, though. This led to a discussion of the orange tip on toy guns. I asked what’s to stop criminals from dipping their gun’s tip in paint, and use that to cause hesitation in police/military forces. He said nothing, and that’s what a lot of them are concerned about. (boo, criminals)
He went off to fight his way to the restroom, which is when they moved our line. Of course. :D We grabbed all his loot and carried over, trusting him to recognize it, if not us. :D He did, and we started talking about what to do to avoid Joe’s cut-n-paste face. He didn’t know what that was, so we explained. I suggested that when it was his turn he should goose Joe. :smirk: I knew he wouldn’t, but his face was a treat!
Got to watch Walter get his photo taken, then asked the guys if they could pretend to be having a ‘heated discussion’ over my head while I smiled, happy-fan oblivious. First shot = glare over my eyeball, resulting in a look of evil cyborg.
Do over. The photog looked at the photo for a really long time – so long that Joe and David were ejecting me from the area, and the military guy was coming in. I said, “Guys, he doesn’t look too sure,” but stepped aside. The three of them were all set up by the time the photog said, “We’ll have to do it again.”
What was there to decide? :laughs:
The commander stepped out, and I stepped back in. A suggestion to remove my glasses was made, and I said, “But then I can’t see.” They all looked at me mockingly (including the fans in line). Um, excuse me? You want me to make sense while I’m in the presence – nay, the hug sandwich - of David and Joe? (Shut up, I’ll take ‘em off next year.) Shot was taken, and I asked Joe what he’d been doing over there (in my peripheral vision). He said he was making the crazy finger. Understandable. Off I went to rejoin Walter.
I’m not even bothered that I look crazy-eyed, goofy, and apprehensive (?)(!) respectively, because I managed to get three, count 'em three non-cut-n-paste faces from Joe. In a row! All different! (That’s like getting seven cherries on a slot machine, right?) And since they didn’t actually do my idea, I can use it again next time (when I will be wearing decidedly fewer lenses). :grin:
Met up with Walter and went to get his bags from the concierge.
Originally, he’d thought he wasn’t going to be able to do the duo photo op, but his flight was late enough that the ladies at our dessert table convinced him that it was possible, and that he’d regret it if he didn’t. Thank you, ladies!! He’s said several times how glad he is that he got to do it. Anyway, bags collected, hugs exchanged, he headed for the shuttle to the airport, and I went up to get ice from the second floor machine. No such item. Third floor machine – “Shit!” I realized that I had all of his photos. “Stick ‘em in my bag for stashing. Don’t worry, I'll remember to give them back after the photo op.” Yeah, not so much. Go to call him – hey look, a voicemail. Walter: “Come to the lobby. You have my photos.” :chuckle: Oops.
Reconnect. Hand over the hostages. Re-hug. Re-shuttle (this time successfully).
Went back to the ballroom, to wait for the evening autograph session for Joe and Davids H. and D. to start. They were showing videos from previous cons and I got to see almost two minutes before it ended. (Is my luck - I'm used to it.) There was an announcement that the autographs wouldn’t be in here, but outside and to the left. “That’s the whole rest of the lobby,” I thought. “Can’t they be more specific? Whatever, I’ll see the crowd.” Then they started taking down the stage. Oh, they’re serious. Okay. Back out to the lobby, where I told some people about the change, and we decided that Creation must mean the registration table just outside and to the left of the ballroom entry doors. Nope. It was outside and to the other left. You may know it as … the right. :snorgle:
It seems a Jewish wedding was scheduled to start in the ballroom before the con events were scheduled to end. I sat in one of the lobby chairs and watched a parade of fantastic black or brown dresses and black hats parade past. At one point, a wedding group approached from the left, while a Mom/Dad/teenager-in-skank-training-clothing (shortshort lowrider cutoffs, dingy, midriff-baring football jersey, etc.) family unit neared on my right. I expected a cultural explosion, but it did not come to pass. (Wow, who lets their kid dress like that at a hundred-plus dollar a night hotel?) (Wait – I mean, who lets their nanny let their kid dress …. Sorry. Assumptive and judgmental, I know.)
Ran into
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Trio
Son of Basket
Very artistic signature, don’t you think?
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Went back to my post and chatting. Jess came up to report that the Joe photos were being set out, so it shouldn’t be long ‘til the duos. Without a second thought, I rushed off with them to check. Good thing I never joined the military. Firing squad, for sure. We passed Kassandra, who was waiting for the photog to fix the stoner eyes he let pass through. (I get the feeling he’s not that invested.) More chatting, during which I realized (aloud) that Walter had the slip of paper with Kimberly’s (fan with Paul McG) email. Argh! Luckily, someone heard me, recognized her, and sent her over to give it again. Yeah for community!
The photos came out while she and I were talking about High, Low, and Central Belt Scottish.
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Met Kim in the lobby, and was waiting for the rest (Kassandra and one other having gone ahead to secure us a big table) when
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Finally, our group headed for Giordano’s. We got there to find Kassandra and cohort in a tiny corner booth. ??? (It turns out that we took longer to arrive than expected – shocking, right? - so the waitresses kicked them out of the big table and into the corner, insisting that they order right then. Mean.)
We figured our final tally, they wrangled four tables in a line, and we all sat down. They don’t usually split checks, but would treat us as four different tables. (Which was fantastic, since nobody wanted to put dinner for 15 on their card.) Orders in, chatting abounds, and Sue took photos of us all, which led to Christine handing her camera around for the same effect. I’d like to see those. Con photos of all years were handed around and admired. We exchanged email addresses, which was when it finally hit me that Alicia is
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Food came, food consumed, we vamoosed. (Kassandra had already gone,
We finally got to see Kim’s video (“Never want to go to work”?) that technical difficulties and bad rescheduling had made most of us miss. And we watched Cheryl’s (“You’ve got a friend in me”) again. Both caused much laughter and awwwwws.
Left about 11:40pm and headed over to the Marriott to retrieve my car and cooler. They reminded me of the toll roads. Argh! I paid the $3.50 ATM usury fee (and it hurt), just to be sure to have enough change. My room card wouldn’t make the gate lift, despite the desk clerk’s earlier assurances. Back to the lobby, got the hint (hit red button), and I was on my way. Midnight.
Just as I was approaching the first toll booth, my phone rang. Walter has landed and is awaiting his connection to home. Yay! But then - oh, noes! I reached to open the little coin compartment in the dash, and managed to pop the hood instead. Freak out, hang up, pull over, secure hood, resume. Luckily the rest of the drive was completely incident free. Got home at 5am and posted my pithy announcement. :P
Fed the cats, started the laundry, hit the hay. And that’s it for another year.
Apologies to anyone I’ve left out (like, for example,
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(Also, next year, I’m going to take Polaroid mug shots of people with their real and LJ names and use 'em as flashcards. And sell folding fans for fun and profit. Psst! Hey, buddy. Wanna buy a fan? :grin: )
The Personalization for All Plan
1) The only announcements made during the autograph sessions were calling up the next row. Nothing else was going on to keep us from getting impatient and restless.
2) Saturday and Sunday they held an auction each day. They weren't massively well attended, and lasted about an hour each day.
Why not combine the events? Run the auction while we’re lined up for autographs? Bidders can wave from the wall as easily as from a seat. When it’s time for the next row to go to the wall, the auctioneer says so between items. It’s a win for them, too, because a larger crowd makes bidding wars more likely, thus raising their take. Announce at the start that whoever wins an item can get out of line to claim it and stash it at their chair before getting back in line where they were. Then nobody would consider them to be butting.
This would add an hour to the autograph session each day, give us some entertainment while we wait (or we can ignore it and chat – just like we did from the seats), and increase Creation’s profits. Can anyone see a downside?
Here's how to sell it to Creation. Tell them it's to increase auction revenue by having a captive, autograph awaiting, audience. Further, suggest that if any fan complains about being forced to attend, they point out that it has been added onto the autograph time, thus increasing it and allowing for personalizations. Spin the Creation-ers by giving them spin for the customers. (My only worry is that they would fold the auction into the autograph time and put something else in its current time slot, leaving us with both an unavoidable sale and no personalizations.)
I told my sister the plan, and when I got to the part about holding the auction while we were in line, she blurted, "Hostages!" (The logic is hereditary, you see.)
ETA: It seems that I hallucinated Kassandra at David's evening autograph. Who was that, and where the hell did I leave my head?
no subject
Date: 2011-09-07 01:54 pm (UTC)I think Joe is wearing knee pads. That is so weird, just like him. LMAO.
and YAY for not getting cut and paste face!
aha!
Date: 2011-09-07 05:57 pm (UTC)Why would Joe be wearing knee pads? Unless the wife insists on it now, whenever he leaves the house, due to his recent run of injuries. :grin:
no subject
Date: 2011-09-07 04:48 pm (UTC)Did I see you up at the autographs? I don't remember this. I think I was downstairs having my EPIC battle of SUCK with Creation over my (still)
fucked upscrewy photo. That never got resolved. Because my head exploded.We got there to find Kassandra and cohort in a tiny corner booth. ??? (It turns out that we took longer to arrive than expected – shocking, right? - so the waitresses kicked them out of the big table and into the corner, insisting that they order right then. Mean.)
Apparently they frown on having a party of you and your 15 closest imaginary friends there. Humph. I'll just remember that NEXT time I'm taking my imaginary friends to dinner! Yes I will. ;)
(Kassandra had already gone, to try again with the photog folks. They suck, so no luck.)
I'd actually gone with the cohort back to the hotel to soak in the hot tub and hopefully melt away some of the stress from Creation's fuck up.
As for your plan? Totally brilliant. Creation will NEVER go for it because it is just SO brilliant. They can't stand things that are as awesome as that. :(
who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-07 06:13 pm (UTC)They were MEAN. It's not like the joint was full or anything.
Dude, what? I thought you were going to have another go at them. I'm sure the hot tub gave you way more satisfaction than you would've gotten from them anyway. I'll fix both spots right now.
Thank you. All it takes it a small application of logic. (And a large blop of guile, to get the non-logics to do it my way. :grin: )
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-07 06:31 pm (UTC)Maybe it was Jenn? (aka
They were MEAN. It's not like the joint was full or anything.
Seriously, yes. I was all "Uh...what?" when they told us "we have to seat you now" (because honestly? We weren't even AT the big table waiting. We were just hanging out in the lobby. Out of the way)
I'm sure the hot tub gave you way more satisfaction than you would've gotten from them anyway.
Except for two things it did- those being of course- When the instant I got in it tried to take my top off (seriously I barely KNEW it! I mean really now. Cheeky hot tub) and when the teenagers came in to swim and were being really weird and making us feel like skeezy old women. (If its not cool to wear baggy pants normally it is DEFINITELY not cool to wear baggy swim trunks.)
All it takes it a small application of logic.
Creation has NO idea what Logic is. Otherwise I wouldn't have a bad photo op still. Ugh.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-08 08:49 am (UTC)Wait. You were quietly waiting for your party and they *forced* you to be seated and order? That's insane! (Unless business is so bad that they feared you'd change your minds and leave.) Who was it that was with you, again? I'm drawing an absolute blank on her name, though I can picture her clearly. (God, I'm old. Or, at least, senile.)
Maybe you should avoid Chicago completely. There seem to be something in the air there, where you're concerned. :P
I find that most people have never cozied up to Logic, although they usually can make nice when introduced. I sorta fear that Creation will be in the minority. Sad. I can't figure out what was up with that photog. How could he pass that? Or even think about passing the second go-around of mine? It was not a judgment call - it was crying out for a do-over. I'm not entirely sure that he didn't retake it just because I showed NO signs of leaving, and you didn't even get that opportunity.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-08 06:59 pm (UTC)Yes, we were waiting QUIETLY and they forced us into a booth. They said something along the lines of "if we don't seat you now you'll have to leave and stop loitering." Frankly my imaginary friends were SHOCKED by their behavior.
Who was it that was with you, again?
Her LJ name is
I can't figure out what was up with that photog. How could he pass that? Or even think about passing the second go-around of mine?
As I told Gary (to his face)- This is the FIRST bad photo op I've EVER gotten with them. (I mean I may not be in LOVE with some of the others but that's personal issues regarding certain things- like the way I look in t-shirts or my scar or whatever) His reply (at the time) "Well if you really don't like it we can reshoot it at one of our other events providing we have the same stars" I'm not sure about you but I seem to remember creation making a BIG deal out of this being the FIRST!TIME!EVER! That they had Ben and Chris together. So- NO. They can't reshoot it because they don't get these two together. :(
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-09 05:53 am (UTC)Maybe I can't remember her name because I never heard it. What a relief. :grin:
It sounds like Gary is promising you something he knows he won't have to deliver. Fucker.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-09 06:05 am (UTC)Nope. Totally not even doing that. And as you guys saw when you got there they were just *SO* crowded that we were holding up the line with our imaginary friends ;)
Maybe I can't remember her name because I never heard it.
I think I only introduced her by real name totally forgetting her LJ name... *nods* It's all MY fault.
It sounds like Gary is promising you something he knows he won't have to deliver.
I think my *favorite* part is when I showed Gary and he was all "It's not THAT bad. I mean yeah you look like you're sort of dozing off but..." And I was all :O "Uh...no. I look like I'm high." "Right. Well I have to go tend to this thing... *disappears*"
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-10 07:03 am (UTC)What is her real name? I can't remember that one either.
What a douchenozzle. (Unsurprising, but still... )
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-10 07:16 pm (UTC)Can I vote for elsewhere? (Though I have a feeling I won't get to go to Chicago next year :( )
What is her real name?
Megan. ;)
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-12 04:03 am (UTC)Why wouldn't you get to go to Chicago next year?
Megan! I was never going to remember that.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-12 04:16 am (UTC)Uhm...they might. The other option might be to rent one of those limo things? (Or! OR! A PARTY BUS!!! How awesome would THAT be?! I mean split the cost among everyone its not really THAT expensive to get one)
Why wouldn't you get to go to Chicago next year?
Two reasons:
1) The midgety person at home (I am a single mum and in order to jet off to the wilds of Chicago had to get the parentals to watch her)
2) I'd like to save up to go to Germany in the next 18 months. Which means no cons. Or breathing. Or...anything. But it's Germany (okay mostly I'm going for- my German best friend and then there's the whole "we want to go see the concentration camps together" thing. Yes, I do realize we're strange ducks ;))
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-14 04:35 am (UTC)You could bring the midget with. Introduce her to Braedon, they fall in love, get married and produce the strangest kids ever born ('cause you know his kids are going to be fucked up. I think the psychological burden on his kids wold overcome even the healthiest influence any parental partner could bring to bear).
Okay, this is a valid reason. Forgoing travel to a place/event you've already done to go somewhere new and meet up with a friend with like interests. Whatever, with your logic. :sticks tongue out:
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-14 04:08 pm (UTC)See...I was thinking instead of the restaurant getting the party bus to serve as the meeting hall. (As alcohol/drinks are included in the price of rental. Also- three words- Detachable Stripper pole. ;))
You could bring the midget with. Introduce her to Braedon, they fall in love, get married and produce the strangest kids ever born
If I wanted to introduce her to Braedon? I'd just drag her to Vancouver with me next year. But I seriously pity anyone who ends up with him as a Son-in-Law.
Forgoing travel to a place/event you've already done to go somewhere new and meet up with a friend with like interests. Whatever, with your logic.
Well I get to see her next weekend (the 23-25th) in San Francisco. It's going to be AWESOME. :D
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-14 10:05 pm (UTC)OMG, I was kidding! Keep everyone you like away from that little dude. There's not enough therapy in the world to fix all the stuff that's gonna be wrong with that guy by the time he gets to adulthood.
Yeah, but more is better.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-15 05:06 am (UTC)I don't know if they do or not but...it could be worth investigating?
There's not enough therapy in the world to fix all the stuff that's gonna be wrong with that guy by the time he gets to adulthood.
I don't think there is enough therapy in the world for his future in laws either. ;)
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-15 10:43 pm (UTC)I think it's too late for the little guy already.
Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-16 03:24 am (UTC)Re: who's that girl?
Date: 2011-09-17 08:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-09-14 09:04 pm (UTC)Great pics and write up!
joe's pants
Date: 2011-09-14 10:08 pm (UTC)What the hell could they be??
Thanks! (Next year, voice recorder for name/event accuracy. :grin: )